This life i live is so dramatic. i was talking to J and she said that it seemed like it was more than one person would go threw in a life time.
I miss J.
today i took a hard fall. I wont lie. it hurts me a lot to hear about B with someone eles (V) so soon and writing about her the same way he did to me.. he is so happy. as much as i dont want him, its the awkward jealously that kills me and eats me up inside to the point i wish i could just drop dead.
me and my old friend K. (shes pretty much the one girl who understands 100% about everything) We were talking about how sometimes we think about doing something stupid to hurt ourselves just so we can put the blame and guilt on someone else.. someone who has hurt us. i always thought about it. but i never told anyone. K understood though... as much as we both know you cant blame someone for your emotions and actions, it always seemed like something that would relieve stress.
School is coming soon. and with all this stress from B and everything else, i dont know what im going to do. ill admit to the fact that my self confidence is at an all time low. with everything i have to do and get involed with, i fear im going to break down... emotionally, i may not be able to handle it.

M stopped by becs today, just to see me. he is very good at understanding how i feel. he read my mind today when he told me i was just stressed out about school coming, and all this with B. Hes absolutly right. but he gave me a hug, and it made things seem that much more easy.

me and Bec talked about everything.. from our feelings.. to rugby.. bec rules.

P has been added to my list of best friends, i told him tonight.

and in other good news.. i had a very good hair day today... and got my second holes done! (Bec got her 4th ones redone!)